Questions to ponder about you
- Are you attracting people who speak to your pain or who speak to your truth? Are you looking for someone to soothe your pain, or are you looking for an actual relationship? Most times, when we move into another relationship before we are healed, we attract people who speak to our pain. If your last relationship didn’t give you a lot of attention, and you meet someone who gives you a lot of attention, then you feel happy. For a little bit. As soon as you get fulfilled in the area of attention, you start to notice who this person really is that you got with, and you start to ask yourself, “how in the world did I get here?”
2. What are you running from in your past that are creating obstacles? What experiences have you had in the past that you are still operating from?
3. Do you have a clear vision of what you want? Are you asking for things because you never had them/they were missing in the last relationship or are they things you truly desire?
4. Have you cleared all of the defense mechanisms that you have developed or that your past relationship may have required? What defense mechanisms have you created based on past relationships? Do you shut down when someone yells at you? Do you leave the room or house when you don’t want to hear what someone says because you have always done it that way, and it worked for the last relationship? Is it really working for you now?
5. When you look in the mirror, do you see the same traits in you that you want to attract in a mate?
6. Do you love yourself enough to say no to what you don’t want and yes to what you do want, and have you gained enough wisdom and insight from your past to know the difference?
From Love and Relationships, Sweet 2016